Why Most People Struggle in Life—and How to Turn It Around
What Are You Feeding Your Mind?
Imagine standing in a kitchen with two bowls in front of you.
One bowl is full of fresh, vibrant ingredients—ripe fruits, crisp vegetables, and aromatic herbs.
The other?
It’s filled with spoiled leftovers, stale bread, and unrecognizable mush.
Which bowl would you use to cook a meal?
You wouldn’t hesitate—you’d reach for the fresh ingredients.
Yet, when it comes to life—our thoughts, actions, and decisions—most people unconsciously feed themselves from the second bowl.
They focus on what they don’t want:
- the fears
- the doubts
- the failures
And then they wonder why life tastes so bitter.
The truth is, the way you think shapes your reality.
If your inputs are garbage, your outputs will reflect that.
But there’s a way to flip the script.
Let’s dive in.
Your Biology:
Hardwired for Survival, Not Fulfillment
Let’s take a quick trip back in time.
Picture our ancestors living thousands of years ago.
Every day was a fight for survival—dodging predators, hunting food, and avoiding deadly threats.
In that world, focusing on dangers wasn’t just a habit; it was life or death.
Fast forward to today, and you’re carrying the same wiring.
Your brain is still scanning for threats, constantly asking,
“What could go wrong?”
But here’s the kicker: most of the “threats” we face today aren’t life-threatening.
Think about it.
That awkward email you sent?
It’s not a tiger chasing you.
The criticism you received at work?
It’s not a famine.
Yet, your brain reacts as if it is.
Now add modern marketing into the mix.
Every ad, every headline, every clickbait story is designed to exploit this wiring.
Fear sells.
It grabs your attention because your brain is programmed to prioritize threats over opportunities.
So, no, it’s not your fault that you focus on what you don’t want.
It’s biology.
But biology isn’t destiny.
The Modern Dilemma:
Living in the Safest Era Yet Feeling Miserable
Here’s a fun fact: according to books like Factfulness and The Better Angels of Our Nature, we’re living in the safest, most prosperous, and happiest time in human history.
- Fewer wars.
- Longer lifespans.
- More access to education, healthcare, and opportunity.
Yet, most people don’t feel that way.
Why?
Because we’re swimming in a sea of negativity.
Turn on the news, scroll through social media, or glance at your inbox.
It’s a barrage of fear and problems.
Think about it: When was the last time you saw a headline that said,
“Today, billions of people went about their lives, healthy and happy”?
Exactly.
Your brain latches onto the bad and ignores the good.
It’s like spending all day staring at the bowl of spoiled leftovers and forgetting the fresh ingredients sitting right next to it.
The Shift:
Stop Feeding the Garbage
Here’s where things get interesting.
You don’t have to stay stuck in this cycle.
You can break free.
The solution?
Shift your focus from what you don’t want to what you do want.
It’s simple, but not easy.
Your brain is like a muscle—it’s been trained for years to default to fear and problems.
But just like any muscle, it can be retrained.
The “GIGO” Principle:
Garbage In, Garbage Out
You may have heard the saying, “Garbage in, garbage out.”
It’s a simple truth: what you feed your mind determines what you get out of life.
If you constantly consume fear-driven headlines, toxic relationships, and self-doubt, guess what?
You’ll produce a life filled with anxiety, negativity, and stagnation.
But here’s the twist: what if you flipped it?
What if instead of garbage, you fed your mind greatness?
Let’s try a new mantra:
- Great in, great out.
- Or, if that feels too ambitious, good in, good out.
Think of it like planting a garden.
If you plant weeds, you’ll grow weeds.
If you plant flowers, you’ll grow flowers.
What are you planting in the garden of your mind?
The Fun of Focusing on What You Want
Here’s the exciting part: shifting your focus doesn’t have to feel like a chore.
It can actually be fun.
Start small.
Imagine waking up and asking yourself:
- What do I want to create today?
- What would make this week amazing?
- What kind of person do I want to be in this moment?
Now, picture feeding your mind with content that inspires and motivates you: books, podcasts, conversations with uplifting people.
It’s like swapping out those stale leftovers for a gourmet meal.
Over time, this shift transforms the way you see the world.
You stop looking at life as a series of problems and start seeing it as a field of possibilities.
My Real-Life Stories:
What Happens When You Focus on What You Want
Let me share a quick story.
There was a time in my life when I was stuck.
I’d wake up thinking about everything I hated: my job, my circumstances, my insecurities.
Every day felt like a grind.
Then one Sunday morning, I sat down with my journal and asked myself three simple questions:
- Where am I?
- How did I get here?
- Where do I want to go?
That last question hit me like a ton of bricks.
I realized I had spent years obsessing over what I didn’t want and almost no time thinking about what I actually did want.
So, I made a decision. I started small—writing down one thing I wanted to achieve that week.
Then another.
Over time, those small wins snowballed.
Fast forward to today, and my life is unrecognizable.
And it all started with a shift in focus.
The Practical Steps:
How to Flip the Script
- Audit Your Inputs
Look at what you’re consuming daily—news, social media, conversations. Are they feeding your fear or your potential? - Define What You Want
Take 10 minutes right now. Write down what you want in your career, relationships, health, and personal growth. Be specific. - Feed Your Mind Daily
Replace negative inputs with positive ones. Read a chapter from an inspiring book. Listen to a podcast that challenges your thinking. Talk to people who lift you up. - Celebrate Small Wins
Every time you focus on what you want and take a step toward it, celebrate it. Progress builds momentum. - Revisit and Refine
Life isn’t static, and neither are you. Check in regularly to see if what you’re focusing on still aligns with who you’re becoming.
How Far Can You Go?
Here’s the question I’ll leave you with,
How far can you go when you stop feeding yourself garbage and start planting greatness?
The truth is, you’re not stuck.
You’re not broken.
You’re just feeding your mind the wrong ingredients.
The moment you choose to focus on what you want—truly want—is the moment everything begins to change.
This isn’t about ignoring life’s challenges or pretending everything is perfect.
It’s about taking ownership of your inputs and deciding to create a better output.
So, what’s it going to be?
The bowl of spoiled leftovers or the feast of fresh possibilities?
Choose wisely.
Your future self is counting on you.