The Surprising Secret to Learning from Anyone (Even People You Don’t Like)
How I Was an Idiot (And How It Cost Me Big Time)
I used to be an idiot.
Okay, maybe that’s a little harsh, but let’s just say I was a less wise version of myself.
When I was younger, if I didn’t like someone, I wrote them off completely.
If they rubbed me the wrong way, if they seemed clueless, if they had an annoying laugh—boom.
They were dead to me.
I didn’t just ignore them socially—I ignored everything they could’ve taught me.
Their insights, experiences, mistakes, and lessons.
All of it.
Gone.
Flushed down the drain with the bathwater.
And at the time?
I thought I was being smart.
Why waste time on people who weren’t worth it?
Then something changed.
It wasn’t some grand epiphany.
It was a slow realization.
I started noticing people I didn’t like still getting results.
Maybe they were making money, building businesses, mastering a skill, or leading teams.
And while I didn’t respect them, I had to admit… maybe there was something they were doing right.
Then as I was reading The Book of Five Rings by Miyamoto Musashi.
Musashi, the undefeated samurai, wrote that even though he had developed his superior two-sword style, he still studied every other school of sword fighting.
Even the weak ones.
Even the outdated ones.
Even the ones that weren’t a real threat.
Why?
Because there was always something to learn.
A weakness to exploit.
A technique to refine.
A strategy to absorb.
And that’s when it hit me: I’d been limiting myself.
I’d been rejecting valuable lessons just because they came in packages I didn’t like.
Once I fixed this? My learning, growth, and success skyrocketed.
The Three Levels of Learning from Anyone
We’re about to break down three levels of learning from anyone—even the people you dislike, even the people who are clueless, and yes, even the people who are straight-up wrong.
If you can master this, you’ll unlock a superpower most people never develop.
Because let’s be real—most people don’t want to learn from those they dislike.
They’d rather stay comfortable, nodding along with the people they already agree with.
But that’s not how you grow.
Level 1: Learning from the People You Like (Easy Mode)
Let’s start with the easy one.
You have mentors, role models, and experts you look up to.
These are the people whose books you read, whose podcasts you listen to, whose YouTube videos you binge.
No resistance here.
You want to learn from them.
But even here, most people get lazy.
They absorb the surface-level lessons but fail to extract the deeper principles.
Next time you’re learning from someone you admire, don’t just take their advice at face value.
Instead, ask yourself:
- Why does this work for them?
- How does this apply to me?
- What principles are at play beneath their strategies?
The goal isn’t to copy them—it’s to internalize why their approach works so you can adapt it for yourself.
Level 2: Learning from the People You Don’t Like (Hard Mode)
This is where most people tap out.
They hear something from someone they dislike, and their brain shuts down.
“This guy’s an idiot.
Nothing he says can be useful.”
And that’s where they screw up.
Here’s the truth: Even people you dislike—maybe especially people you dislike—have insights you’re missing.
Try this exercise:
Think of someone who irritates you but has success in an area you care about.
- Maybe they’re fit but annoying.
- Maybe they’re wealthy but arrogant.
- Maybe they have a skill you admire but a personality you can’t stand.
Now, instead of rejecting them outright, ask:
- What are they doing that works?
- What can I extract from their methods without adopting their attitude?
- What’s their blind spot, and how can I avoid it while still benefiting from what they do well?
This is how you level up.
Instead of throwing out everything just because you don’t like the source, you cherry-pick the gold and leave the trash behind.
I’ve done this with business, martial arts, writing—everything.
I’ve learned negotiation tricks from people I wouldn’t trust with five bucks.
I’ve picked up training techniques from egomaniacs.
I’ve studied marketing from people I’d never want to work with.
Why?
Because their personalities don’t change the fact that some of what they do works.
Level 3: Learning from the People Who Are Completely Wrong (Boss Mode)
Here’s where it gets next-level.
You can even learn from people who are completely wrong.
Not just people you dislike—people whose ideas are flat-out bad.
How?
By studying their mistakes.
If someone is failing miserably, making dumb decisions, or repeatedly shooting themselves in the foot, you have a golden opportunity:
- What assumptions led them to this failure?
- What blind spots did they ignore?
- How can I make sure I don’t fall into the same trap?
This is one of the most underrated ways to learn.
You don’t just learn from winners—you learn from losers.
You learn from what not to do.
Every failed entrepreneur, every bad boss, every cringe-worthy marketer, every out-of-touch leader—they’re giving you real-time case studies on what doesn’t work.
If you’re paying attention, you can learn from their mistakes without having to make them yourself.
How This Changes Everything
Once you start seeing the world this way, everything shifts.
Every person—whether they’re brilliant, annoying, clueless, or even straight-up wrong—becomes a potential teacher.
And that means you’ll grow faster than everyone else.
Most people only learn from people they like.
That’s a slow path.
The real winners?
They extract value from everywhere.
They take what works, discard what doesn’t, and constantly refine their approach.
So here’s the challenge:
- Think of someone you’ve written off. Maybe you don’t like them. Maybe you don’t respect them. Maybe you think they’re full of it.
- Ask yourself what you can learn from them. If they’re successful, what’s working for them? If they’re failing, what mistakes can you avoid?
- Use that lesson. Adapt it, improve it, make it your own.
This simple shift—learning from everyone—is one of the biggest unlocks for growth, success, and wisdom.
Don’t throw out the baby with the bathwater.
Because sometimes, the best lessons come from the most unexpected places.
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